Directing: B
Acting: B
Writing: B-
Cinematography: B+
Editing: B+
Special Effects: B

I’m having a hard time deciding who this movie Gretel & Hansel is for, exactly. This is a relatively faithful adaptation of an old-school Brothers Grimm fairy tale, which means it is abundant with dark tones and creepy turns, and short on charms or thrills. It’s quite short, at a brisk 87 minutes, and while I would not say it’s ever dull, it has so little story to tell that it still has measured pacing.

Although the original fairy tale, Hansel and Gretel, was German, American director Osgood Perkins sets the story in some medieval time, its few characters speaking with an accent somewhere between American and . . . Irish? These people seem to exist somewhere outside of time, which is perhaps deliberate.

The original story had more about both these kids’ parents. At the beginning of Gretel & Hansel, we only ever see their mother, complaining about the lack of food, and ultimately demanding that her children leave and fend for themselves. Instead of having the kids close in age, Gretel is far older and therefore here shouldered with most of the responsibility: she is played by a 16-year-old Sophia Lillis; Hansel by 8-year-old Samuel Leakey, in his feature film debut. Both are serviceable in their parts, though Leakey, by virtue of his much younger age, is the one who manages to be adorable. Gretel’s incredibly short haircut seems odd but whatever, I’m willing to go with it.

The more exciting casting choice is that of Alice Krige as the witch, who awaits these children in a house in the middle of the woods they are wandering. Alas, the house is not made of gingerbread or sweets, or any kind of food, for that matter. It’s made of wood, what a disappointment! The kids peer through the window and find a table covered end to end with freshly cooked meats and breads and cakes.

Until this point, for maybe a third of the film’s run time, Gretel & Hansel is a sort of on-foot road movie, occasional surprises awaiting them along their journey. For instance, Charles Babalola as “The Hunter,” who dispatches a threatening . . . I don’t know, zombie? This movie has a tendency to go in directions that have little straightforward explanation.

And that aspect of it, I was kind of into. Osgood Perkins seems intent to establish and maintain a peculiarly creepy tone, rather than flesh out this story. This includes a couple appearances of pentagrams, and a vaguely sickening sequence involving entrails. It’s all scored with music that has a hint of melancholy eighties synthesizer, composed by Robin Coudert but only referred to in the credits as “Music by Rob.” According to IMDb, he has many projects on which he is credited in this manner. Maybe it’s aspirational: one day he hopes to be one-name famous, like Cher or Madonna. Well, he’s been at it for fifteen years, so I hope he’s not holding his breath.

There are moments of earthly beauty, as the dark magic takes greater hold over these children. In one shot, a tree outside the house becomes attracted to Gretel, and reaches down toward her with its branches, like a giant, outstretched arm, as she reaches out back to it. It’s an indelible image, and I found myself thinking, Okay, that’s cool. I wish this movie had more moments like it.

So, happy ending or no? Gretel & Hansel splits the difference, which is certainly respectable. This is that odd kind of outlier of a movie, which is unlike anything else, but still won’t likely linger in your memory long.

Overall: B