My tweets

  • Thu, 8:13: So I went to search for a particular skyscraper in Guiyang, China called Lieban International Plaza and this was Google’s response. Lesbian friends: what have you not been telling us?? 🤔 I know you’re an organized bunch but holy hell. https://t.co/jSiRy0ieI3
  • Thu, 10:32: An Open Letter to Sacha Baron Cohen:

    No one needs you to "expose" American intolerance, bigotry and racism that'sbeen plainly obvious for ages. Might I suggest attempting an "art form" that's a tad more original? Being over you is now a bipartisan movement.

    Sincerely, Matthew
  • Thu, 11:32: I love how internal company emails announce lateral moves "with great excitement." An Assistant Store Director at one store will now be Assistant Store Director at another store?? OMG I'm going to pee my pants!
  • Thu, 13:48: Stellar piece on the ways fat people are dehumanized in our culture. I can't wait to read the rest of his book. https://t.co/dvPPrJYVVT
  • Thu, 18:13: I’d just to take a moment and thank that hardbodied jogger for making sure his bare torso glistens in the sunlight. His efforts have not gone unappreciated. 🏃‍♂️🌞