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Big news! As of just this morning, I have a new overnight excursion planned—and it'll be the first of the year, before all the other stuff I already had planned for the year.
I had brought up the Tulip Festival with Marie here at work last week, mentioning that Shobhit and I go both most years. She asked when we're going this year, and I was like: oh. We haven't made a plan to! Yet? So, I brought it up with Shobhit last night, when we went for a walk, both so he could get a Social Review point and so he could get more steps in. (We took an unusual route, by the way: the mile or so northeast along Madison, all the way to 29th, where we saw the huge new building underconstruction, which has already replaced City People's garden store and where the Madison Valley PCC store will open in 2026. I took a couple of photos.)
I noted that I need to burn through PTO anyway, so why don't I take a day off work this month so we can go when it's not nuts-crowded on a weekend?
I texted him this morning the suggestion of Friday next week, April 11. Moments later I sent an alternative idea: why don't I see if we can stay overnight with Mimi and Steve in Mount Vernon the
next Friday, April 18? That's already a busy weekend, but this way we'd actually save on some of the cumulative driving: we could go to my cousin Tammy's wedding with Erin in Everett the next day on our way home. We also have Easter in Olympia the day after that. Anyway, I just needed to run it by Mimi, who has long had an open invitation to have us come stay the night sometime.
Somewhat to my surprise, Shobhit actually said okay to this idea. He doesn't usually like taking up people's generous offers, but perhaps in this case it struck him that the benefits outweighed whatever might have otherwise made him uneasy about it. Besides, we've already been to Mimi and Steve's place—we went there for dinner while up there in 2023 for my Birth Week (the last time we went to the Tulip Festival, incidentally—we never did go last year). So, he has that familiarty going for him as well.
I texted Mimi the idea, noting that I know her availability is not a guarantee—I had run the idea of staying the night with her when Shobhit went to India last year, and she was not available. But, within minutes she texted back that we were welcome!
This makes me very happy for a multitude of reasons, one of which kind of taps into my special brand of OCD. For instance, I have given up on the idea of making my conference trip to the Twin Cities in August a bigger vacation with additional travel to both see my mom's biological sister Cyndi in Baudette, MN and to Winnipeg—I let all that go when I decided to prioritize saving for World Pride Amsterdam in 2026 and returning to Australia in late December 2027. So, what I had initially thought would be seven days of travel in August went down to four.
I did relatively recently also book another weekend trip with Gabriel and his groomsmen from the wedding last year, a three-day weekend in late May on Fox Island. As of yesterday, my projected cumulative number of travel days by the end of the year was 22. Now, thanks to an overnight stay with Mimi this month, that's been bumped back to 24.
Shall we go through them all? What the hell, why not! I have three separate one-night excursions planned this month alone, as two are already planned for my Birth Week. Note that I count "travel days" as both the days I travel to and from a place; any day in between; and any destination outside of my own home or that of my parents.
Friday-Saturday, April 18-19: Mount Vernon, WA (2 travel days)
Saturday-Sunday, April 26-27: overnight with Jennifer at her place in Union (2 travel days)
Wednesday-Thursday, April 30 - May 1: Portland, Oregon (2 travel days)
Friday-Sunday, May 30 - June 1: Fox Island, WA (3 travel days)
Wednesday-Tuesday, June 4-10: World Pride Washington, D.C. (7 travel days)
Wednesday-Saturday, August 13-16: Co+nvergence conference in Saint Paul, MN (4 travel days)
2 days sometime in September, hopefully: North Cascades National Park with Dad (2 travel days)
Monday-Tuesday, December 22-23: Victoria, B.C. with Shobhit and Laney (2 travel days)
And already I'm looking at this for 2026:
April: Overnigh Birth Week stay with Jennifer (2 travel days)
August: World Pride Amsterdam (1-2 weeks)
timing unknown: Las Vegas for Jennifer & Matthew's wedding
timing unknown: Anchorage with Alexia, maybe
Those things alone have the potential to rival the number of travel days I now have in line for 2025. Only two of the trips in 2025 are significant enough to involve flights and more than three days, though. I like to have stuff spread out throughout the year anyway.
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— पांच हजार सात सौ नब्बे —
Anyway. Shobhit made eggplant squash and rice for dinner last night, and it was tasty. I also made chai. We ate while watching the last two episodes of the recently dropped season 1 of
Midcentury Modern on Hulu. Then, Shobhit suggested we take that walk. We went up Madison to 29th and back. I kind of forgot how steep that hill is on the way back.
For the first time in ages, I also took a look at the house on 29th, right across the street from the construction, that had served as the office for the
Seattle Gay Standard between 2000 and 2001. My god, has a lot of new development sprung up around it. I guess that happens over 25 years. I'm kind of amazed that one small house—which I think has been a business of one kind or another all along—has remained intact with no new redevelopment on the site itself.
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Another thing: I finally got around to having Shobhit and myself fill out these questionaires that may result in some kind of diagnosis from our therapist. I think one is used to determine "generalized anxiety disorder." I almost felt bad that I checked "not at all" for any of the list of things I could be struggling with. I really don't have anxiety as a general rule.
There was also the paperwork regarding steps to take in order to maintain a healthy relationship, and I finally read over those carefully as well. This was particularly eye opening for me, as I only read it in application to myself, not in any way projecting how I felt about Shobhit. And I came to a quick, sad conclusion: holy shit am I falling short on a lot of this stuff. Effort goes both ways, and I need to step it up. Some of it is as simple as taking iniviative in a lot of ways that I have not historically done.
I was kind of surprised Shobhit was even open to filling out the questionaires. I have been heartened to see the degree he has actually engaged with therapy, now that we are actually doing it. It makes me feel much better about our shared future.
— पांच हजार सात सौ नब्बे —
[posted 12:30pm]
