Wed, 9:05: Our new private label eggs are selling like gangbusters and providing an opportunity for department emails with dumb egg puns.

"Eggcelent!"

"That's eggciting and not uneggspected."

It's eggscruciating.
Wed, 10:33: GOP response to climate change. https://t.co/tSwMbKIG7h
Wed, 10:56: RT @Nicole_Cliffe: Okay, due to the new Canadian laws I think I can now openly tell you the story of my disabled mom getting her weed plants stolen and how she got them back.
Wed, 14:53: Have you ever been so tired that the toilet seems like a perfectly good place for a nap?
Wed, 19:40: “I know girls who would kill a small child for your hair.” — my hairdresser