Tue, 10:43: Mom update. Fair warning: it is not optimistic.
There is a new ICU doctor on rotation as of today, and there is really no change in Mom’s condition since yesterday. And this now, really, is the issue: her condition is not likely to change. Her 2014 stroke affected the left side of her brain, and the hemorrhaging this time affected the right side. If no other decision is made within the next few days, they will have to transfer her to a nursing home facility, pretty much permanently on a ventilator. We all know Mom would not want that.
Christopher is hoping to bring Bill back for a visit tomorrow, and I have suggested they go over all this with Bill, emphasizing what Mom would want, and the need to minimize her suffering. The decision ultimately goes to Bill, though, which of course is a terrible burden for him.
My niece, Becca, was over today and visited her in the ICU. I spoke to Becca on the phone right after and as expected she was very upset. Mom has not even been conscious since Thursday and although the doctor said it’s possible she could wake to some degree in the future, there’s no expectation of her really coming back. Becca told me, “I hated seeing her like that.” When I said, “I’m not sure I even want to see her like that,” she replied, “Trust me, you don’t.”
To be frank, I think it’s time to let her go. I’ve been surprisingly able to keep it together so far, but that could change. I’m taking it day by day.
